Studies, research, normal observation converge in recognizing that for each the sources of stress can be different, although it is frequently recognized common elements: stresses agents do not exist as such, we deal with the " answers" that each produces to what happens to them.
I mean, it's not my boss, for example, or my neighbour, or my playmate, or my husband, or my very old parent that only I take care of, who stresses me out, but I'm the one who's going to be stressed about it.
And even when my boss really wants to stress me out, well, it doesn't necessarily mean he can.
No cause-and-effect, just chance and probability, fluid correlations.
The funny thing is that, after acknowledging that, in short, everyone has his own stress, looking a little on the net, the suggested remedies are almost the same for everyone: how is it possible that to neutralize different stresses, differentstressors for each, the remedies are the same?
Compared to this, it depends on the substance of which stress is constituted: it is generally recognized that it is an instinctive, emotional physiological response, which we record as emotionally unpleasant, physiological response to the threat that prepares our body to fight or escape, triggering the release of hormones (adrenaline, stamina, cortisol, among others) and producing objective physiological changes.
Archaic emotional response, inherited from our progenitors, to situations that are judged to be threatening: in short, we are facing a danger, something undermines our security, threatens our survival, and "instinctively" activate this ancient response mechanism.
Ancient, archaic, appropriate to face physical threats to the integrity of our body, unfortunately not appropriate to face the frequent difficulties that we encounter in the so-called civil life, made mainly of interactions, relationships, public and private, life in which it is almost always impossible for us to escape or attack, since the costs of consequences would be too high.
And the remedies, do they work?
Of course the answer can only be: it depends... Depends on the subject, the type of stressors to which it is exposed and sensitive, remedies range from "techniques" of relaxation to taking medications, of course only under prescription and under the control of a specialist.
We all know, it also happens that the stress becomes very heavy, to the point of compromising rest, sleep, nutrition, to affect the levels of intellectual performance, not infrequently on the immune system, in short a hell from which it is not easy to get out.
The logic of the remedy, the strategy of all recommended remedies, is the same, as you can see, quite simple to describe: counterbalance, decrease tension, by any lawful means, movement, sports, yoga, healthy nutrition, balanced relationship life, dosage of exposure to the stressor agent, recourse, in severe cases, to psychotherapists and/or psychiatrists.
And does this logic, at least, this strategy work?
Here we go again, here too the answer is: it depends on the cases, generally the drugs can procure long periods of reduced tension, a healthier life helps, and therefore moving, sporting, balanced eating, sleeping a sufficient number of hours (drug-assisted or not) certainly do not harm.
Are there any remedial logics, intervention strategies other than that of reducing tension, and perhaps more effective? Having to submit to any regimen, having to resign yourself to taking a drug for life is not exactly what we wish, if it works and there is nothing else, we resign... but really there is nothing else?
Perhaps it will surprise you to find out that no, there is a bulk of alternatives from cruises to counter-stalking, separations and divorces, abandonment of minors and elderly not self-sufficient, resignation, ludopathies, drug addictions, the list is long, but all these and many others remain faithful to the logic of reducing tension, of considering the tension something to get rid of as quickly and for as long as possible.
As far as I know, a single credible alternative remains standing today, which responds to a different logic, which follows a different strategy, different from the purpose of simply getting rid of or mitigating the tension, and it is the alternative of Sistemics: its logics and strategies DO NOT necessarily consider tension and pain, whenever important, as the first and only thing to worry about , returning to tension and suffering their original life-saving meaning.
Systemics accepts and recognizes that the "instinctive" fight-or-fly scheme is arcaic, yes, but that, with all evidences, apparently, we can not avoid it, we can not defuse this "mechanism",indispensable inheritance of millions of years of evolution of our species, neural code firmly configured in our immense neural network.
And even if we could defuse it, we should be careful not to do so.
Neural mechanism, evidently very flexible, since there are also large differences between what stresses one and what stresses the other: and it is precisely this flexibility that provides us with a first key to the possibility of change, not the mechanism, not its trigger, but the degree with which it comes into play.
In short, we can change the way we control our interaction with what, or who, "stresses", obtaining for us the stable effect of attenuating up to the level of imperceptibility the physical tension induced by this archaic mechanism of self-defense, and the related unpleasant emotions,regaining mastery and control of ourselves.
Without taking anything away from the value of the common sense indications that are presented in literature rather than in courses dedicated to stress management, the tools we need to effectively and radically solve this obstacle are other, in a nutshell:
- adequate knowledge of the neural codes that each uses with what stresses,some common to all and many exquisitely individual, integrated with our primary neural codes
- generation and activation of new neural codes, able to improve, by modifying it, the integration between all the neural codes that we use in dealing with that or who "stresses"
The presentation and discussion of cases help to clarify and understand how we can use Systemics to effectively manage stress, to seize some knowledge necessary to intervene effectively, in our favor and/or to help Others.
The Human Behavior Systemics has helped many people build a new, more effective and efficient governance of their resources, solving and eliminating obstacles that were previously impossible to remove: I think it is important to emphasize this.
We are dealing with a form of evolution, of the development of our new capabilities: what was previously an unsolvable problem, then it became a solved problem, a no-problem-anymore, no remedies are needed.
I gladly present some of the cases I have dealt with, masking, of course, all the elements that can make my interlocutors, customers and students identifiable: I can publicly share a lot of what I have found, simultaneously guaranteeing the necessary confidentiality and protecting their sacrosanct privacy.